Ex-United man Jesse Lingard was unhappy in his final years at the club and considered retiring. In an interview with The Guardian, the Nottingham Forest midfielder discusses his difficult time in Manchester and how the isolation aided his recovery.
Lingard left Manchester United, where he has been a member of the youth system since 2000, in the summer of this year. He recalls his time with The Red Devils as a very difficult phase in his life. “I was operating on autopilot. When I started talking to folks, I was like, Yeah, okay. It went in one ear and out the other, and I didn’t notice anything else. I was numb, and I wanted to be numb so I wouldn’t have to feel anything anymore,” he admits openly.
Lingard’s most extreme moments of despair were during the FA Cup match against Derby County in March 2020. Following the game, a handful of fans yelled the ugliest things at him. The incident occurred when his mother was being treated in a London hospital. This, combined with his mental health, makes the situation untenable. “Because no one understood about my troubles off the field, they assumed. You’re a footballer, you live in a great house, you can manage anything. However, we are all human.”
Ex-United man Jesse Lingard explains how the isolation aided his recovery
When he gets home from a game, the midfielder drinks his problems away. “I’m not much of a drinker. Of course, on nights out, I drank a little. I realised I was in a dangerous situation when I sat at home and started drinking before bed.” Lingard had only one desire: to retire from football. And this was happening as a result of the lockdown.
“I’m not sure where I would be if it hadn’t been for the lockdown. I needed some time to reflect on myself and rekindle the fire. And he succeeds thanks to a slew of videos. On the photographs, he can be seen shining with the English national football team at the 2018 World Cup, in his prime as a footballer. As I viewed the films, I thought to myself, ‘I’m never gonna doubt myself again’,” he added.
The 29-year-old Englishman is finally back on track in his football career. This season, he will appear on a weekly basis for Nottingham Forest. He specifically wants to encourage individuals to talk to one another about mental health issues. “I promise a lot of people, especially in football, will be depressed. It’s a mentally draining sport. It was about being upfront and talking about it for me.”
Lingard wants to urge men, in particular, to initiate the discussion if they have mental health issues, because this is the group that normally speaks less openly about it. “You will not be criticised if you discuss it, even if you are a man.”
